Terri Cole

Psychotherapist & Author of Boundary Boss

Terri Cole is a psychotherapist, author, and one of the most trusted voices in the world on the subject of boundaries. Her book Boundary Boss has helped hundreds of thousands of people understand why they struggle to say no, why they give more than they have, and what it looks like to build relationships that are genuinely reciprocal.

Terri's clinical work is grounded in a simple but powerful insight: that most boundary problems are not character flaws but learned patterns — ways of relating that made sense in the context where they were developed but that cause real harm in adult relationships. Her approach is warm, practical, and deeply non-judgmental, built on the conviction that change is possible for anyone willing to do the work.

She brings to every conversation a combination of clinical expertise and genuine warmth — the ability to make difficult subjects feel not just manageable but genuinely hopeful.

Why They Were on Pair-A-Docs

Terri joined Dr. Sherry Ross and Dr. Tammy Nelson to deliver a deeply practical conversation about setting boundaries, breaking codependent patterns, and reclaiming your power in relationships. The episode covers where boundary problems come from, what they cost us, and how to change.

For Pair-A-Docs, Terri's work is directly relevant to the relational and health questions that Dr. Ross and Dr. Nelson address every day. Dr. Nelson, as a sex and relationship therapist, sees the consequences of boundary problems in couples' intimacy and communication. Dr. Ross sees the health consequences — the ways that chronic over-giving and self-suppression manifest in the body.

The episode is practical, compassionate, and genuinely useful — a conversation that gives listeners both the understanding and the tools to start making real changes in their relationships.

Topics Covered

In this episode, Terri and the doctors covered:

What boundaries actually are — and what they aren't
Where boundary problems come from and why they persist
Codependency: recognizing it and breaking the pattern
How to set boundaries without guilt or conflict
Reclaiming your power in relationships

Their Episode

Episode 13

Terri Cole: Boundary Boss

Psychotherapist and author of Boundary Boss, Terri Cole delivers a deeply practical conversation about setting boundaries, breaking codependent patterns, and reclaiming your power in relationships.

Listen to this episode →