Relationships and Boundaries

Healthy relationships are not just emotionally important — they are medically important. On Pair-A-Docs, Dr. Sherry Ross and Dr. Tammy Nelson explore the science and practice of building relationships that are genuinely reciprocal, honest, and sustaining.

The quality of our relationships is one of the strongest predictors of our health and longevity. Yet most people receive almost no education about how to build and maintain healthy relationships — how to communicate, how to set limits, how to navigate conflict, and how to recognize when a relationship is harming rather than helping. On Pair-A-Docs, we fill that gap.

Questions We Answer

What are boundaries, and why do they matter? Terri Cole defines boundaries clearly and explains why they are essential for healthy relationships — and why so many people struggle to set them.
What is codependency, and how is it different from healthy interdependence? Codependency is widely misunderstood. We provide a clear clinical definition and discuss how codependent patterns manifest in relationships.
How do you actually set a boundary? Setting limits is a skill that can be learned. We discuss the specific communication skills involved and how to handle the discomfort that comes when others push back.
How does trauma affect relationships? Unresolved trauma can create barriers to closeness, trigger conflict, and make it difficult to feel safe with a partner. Dr. Tammy Nelson discusses what couples can do to navigate this.
What does healthy sexual communication look like? Talking about sex with a partner — about desires, limits, and needs — is one of the most important skills in any intimate relationship.
How do boundaries support intimacy? Clear limits actually create the conditions for deeper connection — a counterintuitive truth that Terri Cole and Dr. Tammy Nelson both explore.

Episodes on This Topic

Ep 5

Bryony Cole: The Future of Sex and Intimacy

Founder of Future of Sex and host of one of the world's leading sexuality podcasts, Bryony Cole explores how technology is reshaping intimacy, desire, and human connection.

Ep 7

Jane Seymour: Vitality, Intimacy, and Living Fully

Actress, wellness advocate, and cultural icon Jane Seymour talks about navigating health, vitality, and intimacy at every stage of life — with the kind of honesty only someone who has truly lived it can bring.

Ep 8

Leisha Hailey & Kate Moennig: Living Authentically

Actors and LGBTQ+ icons best known from The L Word, Leisha and Kate bring candid conversation about identity, relationships, and what it means to live authentically — on screen and off.

Ep 10

Johan Martinez-Khalilian: The Conversations Men Never Have

Executive coach to pro athletes, artists, and entrepreneurs Johan Martinez-Khalilian joins us to talk about performance, identity, and the real conversations men are never told to have.

Ep 12

Steven Weber: An Examined Life

Best known for his iconic roles in Wings and Once and Again, Steven Weber joins us for a candid, wide-ranging conversation about relationships, mental health, and what it means to live an examined life.

Ep 13

Terri Cole: Boundary Boss

Psychotherapist and author of Boundary Boss, Terri Cole delivers a deeply practical conversation about setting boundaries, breaking codependent patterns, and reclaiming your power in relationships.

Ep 15

Docs-Only Special: Libido

No guest, no filter — just your two docs going deep on libido. Dr. Sherry Ross and Dr. Tammy Nelson tackle the science, the stigma, and the real talk around desire in this special hosts-only episode.